Riddles!

[spongebob]

radioactive squirrel? lol

probably a cat

[ultswordsman]

neither

[Bakster]

It's probably something illogical and stupid like a car.

I also guess owl.

[ultswordsman]

no

[veteran dawg]

it's a falcon

[Parsley]

Thread's slowing down a bit - so thought I'd chuck in a toughie.

A Sphinx tapped me on the shoulder the other night in the pub...
& the winged fellow said to me,

'Ah, Parsley...
I know what you need,
a fist full of weed...
so bring me this
& I'll pass you the spliff'

(Rhythmic types, those Sphinxters.)

And then he spewed the most confusing conundrum... in a single breath he screamed in my ear:

'ABCDEFGPQRSTUVWXYZ'

Now, for last rites... what did I bring him & why?

[haferhole1]

i dont know what the point of the 1st part was, but iv heard the 2nd be4, u brought him ... 

as 4 ur riddle, ults, its too hard.  lets let people still guess for it, but we can continue with this 1

[Parsley]

Atmosphere, baby.  & hearing before is cheating

I reckon we should award ults bonus points for the first 'ungoogleable' riddle!

[haferhole1]

hearing before is cheating

i didnt know that, ill try to forget all the riddles iv herd

I reckon we should award ults bonus points for the first 'ungoogleable' riddle!

i couldnt agree more! here ya go ults.  and btw, all of his are ungoogleable, he makes them up


ok, ez 1
An executive went away on a long business trip. Before he left he asked his secretary to forward all of his mail. However, he forgot to give her the key to his mailbox. When he realized his mistake, he mailed the key to his office so the secretary could send his mail to him. But, she never did mail it. The executive got angry and phoned his office, planning to fire his secretary. However, she was able to explain to him why she hadn't sent his mail. He quickly realized he was in the wrong and aplogized. What did the secretary say to make the executive realize his error?

[Bakster]

ok, ez 1
An executive went away on a long business trip. Before he left he asked his secretary to forward all of his mail. However, he forgot to give her the key to his mailbox. When he realized his mistake, he mailed the key to his office so the secretary could send his mail to him. But, she never did mail it. The executive got angry and phoned his office, planning to fire his secretary. However, she was able to explain to him why she hadn't sent his mail. He quickly realized he was in the wrong and aplogized. What did the secretary say to make the executive realize his error?

1. "You were on a trip sir, so people didn't send you mail knowing you'd been away"

2. "Someone interecepted the mail with the key, and stole all your mail, dumbass."

3. "Please don't fire me PRETTY PLEASE WITH A CHERRY ON TOP!"

4. "You didn't tell me the address of where you were staying for the business trip was"

5. "Well, it goes like this. I received the mail with the key. I opened the door, but there was no mail, instead there was a letter eating Gabhammit in the mail. Obviously it ate all your letters, so I killed it with a sledgehammer. Then it died, and the gravity continuum of the creature formed a vortex which sucked the whole Earth in. Now the Earth is no longer in the solar system and is in an entirely different universe in which the living conditions are the same for the previous universe. Since you didn't lock your mailbox before you left, the letter eating Gabhammit could eat your mail, and this would have never happened. Therefore it is your fault, and I have solved this riddle for Bakster."

I think Number 4 is right

[haferhole1]

well, no, but ur close on #5 

[ultswordsman]

since no 1 is smart enough its a wolf

[Bakster]

well, no, but ur close on #5 

It's true. Nowhere in the riddle does it state that the business man told the secretary his address for the busines trip.

[Slayer_Z]

The key is locked in his maibox

[haferhole1]

gj slayer.

bakster, even if she did know, she couldnt get to the mail